Biblical Answer

The Standard of a Husbands Love

The standard for a husband's love is the way Christ loved the church (Eph 5:22-23). This means that a husband's love must be sacrificial, just like Christ's love for the church. Christ loved the church through total sacrifice, giving himself up for her. Similarly, a husband should love his wife in the same way, putting her needs before his own and being willing to make sacrifices for her. This kind of love is not based on feelings, but on a decision of the mind and will. It is a commitment to love one's wife, regardless of how one feels.

The Incarnational Nature of a Husbands Love

A husband's love must also be incarnational, meaning that it is expressed in practical ways. This can include sacrificing one's own desires and needs for the benefit of one's wife. In 1 Corinthians 7:5, Paul mentions periodic abstinence from sexual relations for the purpose of prayer, which brings to mind similar voluntary deprivation of one's own desires for the benefit of one's wife. This kind of love is not just about feelings, but about actions and decisions that demonstrate one's commitment to one's wife.

The Importance of Prioritizing Ones Wifes Purity

A husband's love must also prioritize his wife's purity. This means protecting her from sin and temptation, and encouraging her to live a holy and godly life. As Markus Barth notes, "Husbands, love your wives, as [literally, even as] Christ loved the church and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word." (Eph 5:25-26). This is a high standard, but it is one that is necessary for a healthy and fulfilling marriage. By prioritizing his wife's purity, a husband demonstrates his love and commitment to her, and helps her to grow in her faith and in her relationship with God.