Biblical Answer

The Struggle to Forgive

Forgiveness is a complex and often painful process. When we experience hurt, our natural response is to want to hold onto it, to make the other person pay for what they've done to us. But the Bible teaches us that forgiveness is not just a feeling, but a choice we must make (Matthew 6:14-15). It's a choice that requires us to trust in God's justice and sovereignty, even when we don't understand why things have happened the way they have. Forgiveness doesn't mean that what the other person did was okay; it means that we're choosing to release them from our emotional burden and to trust that God will deal with them in His own time.

The Process of Forgiveness

So, how do we forgive when it still hurts? The Bible encourages us to pray for the person we need to forgive (Matthew 5:44). This doesn't mean that we're excusing their behavior or saying that it's okay; it means that we're choosing to release them from our emotional burden and to trust that God will deal with them in His own time. Forgiveness is not a one-time event, but a process that takes time and effort. It's a choice we must make over and over again, until it becomes a natural part of our lives. And it's not just about forgiving others; it's also about forgiving ourselves. When we hold onto guilt and shame, we're not allowing God's forgiveness to cover us (1 John 1:9). We must choose to release ourselves from the burden of guilt and shame and trust in God's forgiveness.

The Power of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not just a feeling; it's a powerful act of self-defense. When we choose to forgive, we're stopping the fatal bleeding of resentment and bitterness in our lives. It's a choice that requires us to trust in God's justice and sovereignty, even when we don't understand why things have happened the way they have. And it's not just about us; it's also about the other person. When we forgive, we're giving them the opportunity to be restored to a right relationship with God and with us. Forgiveness is not always easy, but it's always worth it. As the Bible says, "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy" (Matthew 5:7). When we choose to forgive, we're not just blessing the other person; we're also blessing ourselves. We're allowing God's forgiveness to cover us, and we're experiencing the power of forgiveness in our own lives.