Biblical Answer

The point of fighting is not to avoid conflict or disagreement, but to engage in spiritual combat and settle the matter once and for all with God. The Bible says that "quarrelling means trying to show that the other man is in the wrong" and that "what causes fights and quarrels among you? Dont they come from your desires that battle within you?" (James 4:1). This suggests that the root of conflict is not external, but internal, and that we must first deal with our own desires and heart issues before we can effectively engage with others.

The Bible also teaches that the battle is not against flesh and blood, but against "the evil powers that want to break down their ordered way of life" (Ephesians 6:12). This means that our fight is not just against people, but against the spiritual forces that are driving them. We must be willing to engage in spiritual warfare, using the armor of God and the sword of the Spirit to fight against these forces. This requires perseverance and endurance, as Paul says, "Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus" (2 Timothy 2:3).

The point of fighting is not to win an argument or to prove a point, but to bring glory to God and to experience spiritual growth. When we view our struggles in light of what they provide for us spiritually, rather than what they take from us emotionally, we can find joy and satisfaction in the fight. As Martin Luther said, "Depression is not a battle, but a surrender. The Christian fights, but he does not fight with his own strength, he fights with the strength of God." (1) We must be willing to fight, but we must also be willing to lose the argument in order to win the battle, and to trust in God's sovereignty and provision.