Biblical Answer

Is it okay to not forgive someone who hurt me deeply?

The Bible teaches that forgiveness is a crucial aspect of the Christian life. In Matthew 6:14-15, Jesus says, "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." This verse makes it clear that forgiveness is not optional, but rather a necessary part of our relationship with God. When we choose not to forgive someone who has hurt us, we are, in effect, saying that we are superior to God and that our feelings are more important than His commands.

However, forgiveness is not always easy. In fact, it can be very difficult, especially when the hurt is deep. But the Bible also teaches that forgiveness is not about the other person; it's about us and our relationship with God. When we choose not to forgive, we are allowing resentment to build up inside us, which can lead to spiritual death. Forgiveness is not about justifying the other person's actions; it's about trusting that God is the God of justice and saying, "Father, I trust You to deal with this situation." When we forgive, we are not saying that what the other person did was okay; we are saying that we trust God to bring justice and healing to the situation.

So, is it okay to not forgive someone who hurt me deeply? No, it's not okay. Forgiveness is not just a feeling; it's a choice that we make, and it's a choice that requires practice and effort. When we choose not to forgive, we are choosing to allow resentment to build up inside us, which can lead to spiritual death. But when we choose to forgive, we are choosing to trust God and to allow Him to bring healing and justice to the situation. As the Bible says, "Love keeps no record of wrongs" (1 Corinthians 13:5). When we choose to forgive, we are choosing to love, and that is always a good thing.