Biblical Answer

The Burden of Unforgiveness

Forgiving oneself for not being able to protect one's parents can be a daunting task. The weight of guilt and regret can be overwhelming, especially when we feel that we should have been able to shield them from harm. However, it is essential to understand that forgiveness is a choice we make, not a feeling we experience. As the Bible instructs, "Forgiveness is a choice you make" (Matthew 6:14-15). This means that we can choose to let go of the burden of unforgiveness and allow God to forgive us for our inability to protect our parents.

Understanding God's Sovereignty

In order to forgive ourselves, we must first understand that God is sovereign over all creation, including our parents' lives. As the Bible says, "You are not your own, you have been bought with a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies" (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). This means that our parents' lives were under God's care and protection, and their experiences, including any harm or suffering, were part of God's plan. When we try to take responsibility for our parents' lives, we are, in essence, usurping God's authority. By acknowledging God's sovereignty, we can begin to release the burden of guilt and regret that comes with trying to control or protect our parents' lives.

Practicing Forgiveness

So, how can we forgive ourselves for not being able to protect our parents? The first step is to pray for our parents, asking God to forgive them and to work in their lives. As we pray, we can begin to see that forgiveness is not just about our parents, but also about us. When we forgive ourselves, we are, in essence, forgiving God for not intervening in our parents' lives in the way we wanted Him to. This can be a difficult pill to swallow, but it is an essential step in the process of forgiveness. By choosing to forgive ourselves and our parents, we can begin to experience the freedom and peace that comes with letting go of the burden of unforgiveness. As Jesus says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). When we choose to forgive, we are, in effect, saying, "I trust in God's goodness and sovereignty, and I will rest in His love and care."