As a husband and pastor, I've come to realize that marriage is a situation where our desire to be served and coddled can be replaced with a nobler desire to serve others. True love is revealed not only in the supreme sacrifice, but also in all lesser givings. For me, this means asking myself how I've loved my wife, Susan, in the past two or three weeks in a way that has cost me something vocationally, financially, and with my hobbies, time.
To balance love and sacrifice in our daily routines, it's essential to focus on serving our spouse rather than dominating or manipulating them. This means appreciating my wife, seeking to understand her, and emptying myself, rather than immediately assuming my needs are the most important. It's about putting her needs and desires above my own, and being willing to make sacrifices for her, even if they're not always rewarded or noticed. As I reflect on my own marriage, I realize that my wife Susan's father was a great example of this, as he regularly helped her mother with chores and was involved in the day-to-day domestic operations.
In our marriage, I've come to understand that sacrificing for my wife and children is an essential aspect of love. This means putting their needs and desires above my own, even when it's hard or inconvenient. For example, as a parent, I've learned to sacrifice my plans for my children's desires or needs, so they know they're valued and loved. This is especially true for our children, Joshua and Rebecca, who are still young and need guidance and support. By making sacrifices for them, I'm teaching them the value of love and service, and helping them develop a heart of service and humility.