As I reflect on the concept of identity, I'm reminded of the promises I've made to myself and to others. As a pastor, I've made commitments to my congregation, and as a husband, I've promised to love and cherish my wife, Susan, for 19 years now. These promises are what give me a sense of ipse identity, a constancy over time that defines who I am. I'm not the same person I was 19 years ago, but I'm still the same person because I've held onto these commitments.
When we're forced to let go of our identity, it can be a difficult and painful process. I think of my son, Joshua, who's growing up and developing his own interests and passions. As a parent, it's hard to let go of the identity of being his primary influence and guide. But as he becomes more independent, I'm learning to let go and trust that he'll find his own way. Similarly, when we're faced with changes in our lives, such as health issues or career changes, we may feel like we're losing our sense of identity. But it's in these moments that we're forced to re-examine our commitments and promises, and to find new ways to hold onto our ipse identity.
For me, as a Christian, my identity is not just about who I am, but about who I am becoming. I'm not the same person I was before I became a believer, and I'm still growing and learning as I follow Jesus. This means that I'm constantly being challenged to let go of my old identity and to take on a new one, one that's shaped by my relationship with God. It's a process that's both exhilarating and terrifying, but it's one that I'm grateful for, because it reminds me that my identity is not fixed, but is always being transformed by God's grace.