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How do I love someone without affirming their choices?
Loving someone without affirming their choices can be a delicate balance. When we love someone, we want to show them acceptance and care, but that doesn't mean we have to agree with or condone their actions. In fact, biblical teachings encourage us to love others while still maintaining moral boundaries. This is evident in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, where Paul describes love as being patient, kind, and not seeking to control others, but also as being truthful and discerning.
In our relationships, we must strive to find a middle ground between acceptance and disapproval. This involves actively listening to the other person, asking questions, and seeking to understand their perspective. As mentioned in the passage from The Blessing, The Box, and the Key, we should give our opinion when asked and then try to couch our words in a supportive manner. We should also be willing to openly confess our errors to them and demonstrate our commitment to living differently. This can involve changing our habits of indifference or busyness and making an effort to reach out and touch one another with affection.
Ultimately, loving someone without affirming their choices requires a deep understanding of the person's values and actions. It involves discerning the strengths and gifts of our partner and communicating those in direct, personal, and specific ways. This can help to build trust and intimacy in the relationship, even if we don't agree on everything. By doing so, we can create a safe space for open communication and mutual growth, which is essential for any healthy and loving relationship. As the Bible reminds us, love is not about affirming everything, but about being truthful and discerning while still showing kindness and compassion.








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